I recently saw an advertisement for a TV show that centered on revenge. The tagline for the show was, "Someone has to pay!" That got me thinking. Isn't it a natural response to expect justice for wrongdoing? This seems to be a common human experience spanning time, space, and culture. It is evident at a very young age...just try taking candy from a baby and you will quickly discover their built-in sense of justice! So, we have this justice gene, put there by God (He designed us, remember?) to mirror His own nature as the Righteous Judge.
Often, as I am confronted with my own sinful acts or attitudes, my gut reaction is to think that I have fallen from God's grace, a helpless, hopeless worm in the dust, assuming He feels the same about me. I tend to take on superlative amounts of guilt and let myself be buried under the weight of trying to regain His favor. (By the way, the Accuser loves this situation and will try to make the most of this opportunity to bind us up in lies). This is false humility. It really is a slap in His face, the very face that allowed His beard to be torn out and was spit upon in payment for my wrongs. God looks at me and sees sin no more, but Jesus' Righteousness instead. Who do I think I am to come into the presence of such Grace and think for a minute that my self-imposed penance or feelings of wretched guilt will somehow enhance Jesus' sacrifice? Can I add to a work that has already been finished perfectly? Pride in disguise! No, if I believe that Jesus' blood is enough and that all sin was paid for by His death on the cross, then all I can do from a place of guilt is to receive that priceless gift of His forgiveness.
As a parent, when my kids disobey, I don't want them to weep and moan about for days, ask repeatedly for my forgiveness, become depressed with guilt, or consumed with how awful they are. My ideal situation when they mess up is for them to acknowledge truthfully their wrong and take responsibility (clean up a mess, apologize to a hurt sibling, etc.). But more than anything, I want them to listen to my instructions for how to behave better from then on. If my human heart feels this, how much more so does my heavenly Father's heart desire this for me, His well-loved child? When I become aware of my disobedience, He wants me to respond with true humility: recognizing that my beloved Jesus already paid for that foolish act of mine and I must live in His forgiveness, though I don't deserve it. My justice gene knows instinctively that "someone has to pay"....and what's more, that "someone" should be me! Far more humbling and heart-changing than any penance, accusation, or guilt burden I can conjure up for myself, is the realization that Jesus' punishment has purchased my peace with God. My response to this? Awe. Worship. Gratitude. And teachability...allowing His Truth to teach me wisdom in the inner being. One real look into the heart of Jesus as the sacrificed Lamb will jumpstart the shedding of my old nature and sustain my rejection of the sinful habits that go with it.
Now what about those who wrong me. If I am unable to pay the price for my wrongs, how can I then demand that others pay for their wrongs towards me? Reminds me of the story of the king and his slaves in Matthew 18:21-35 (below). To hold a grudge against someone is to say that Jesus' blood wasn't enough for what they did to me. Another way for my pride to belittle Jesus' ultimate sacrifice.
So, should I just carry on as if sin doesn't effect me negatively? Pretend that they didn't hurt me? No. I carry my wound to the Judge....who happens to be my Bridegroom, (not to mention the King!) and let Him comfort me with Hope and His promise of Justice. Imagine a wife goes out shopping. Hours later, her husband gets a heart-wrenching phone call from the police, saying that she has been beaten and sexually assaulted. He races to his wife's side at the hospital. What tender, intimate words of love and support he would whisper to his wounded beloved. But imagine how quick his demeanor would change if he was informed that the police knew who the perpetrator was, but hadn't arrested him...oh, there he is, over by the vending machine. Can you visualize the ferocity of the husband's jealous anger over the injustice done to his wife as he approached the man who touched the apple of his eye?
Now, see your Bridegroom's eyes...full of tenderness as He comforts you. But for the one who injures His beloved, beware the burning fire of His wrath! If you read Revelation, you will see clearly that jealous, fiery Bridegroom coming to wage war on all that hinders His love on the earth! Fear not, beloved, He will avenge. It is a terrifying thing to be on the receiving end of that vengeance. And permanent. He is true to His nature of Love, and will be long-suffering, giving every opportunity for the wicked to enter into His Righteousness. But his nature is also Just, and there is coming a Day when His final judgements will be issued, and He will finally reject those who have continually rejected Him. I want to live consumed with the passion to know Him and be counted among those He loves on that day. And I want my heart to also be consumed with His passion to see not even one person waste His most costly gift!
The time is too short to hold that grudge.
Bliss to you!
Sarah
Scriptures to think on...
Matthew 18:21-35
"21 Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.
23 “For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves.24 When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. 25 But since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded him to be sold, along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made. 26 So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you everything.’ 27 And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him andforgave him the debt. 28 But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ 29 So his fellow slave fell to the ground andbegan to plead with him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you.’ 30 But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owed. 31 So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their lord all that had happened. 32 Then summoning him, his lord said to him, ‘You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’ 34 And his lord, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. 35 My heavenly Father will also do the same to you, if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart.”"
Galatians 2:20-21
"20 I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. 21 I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly.”
Revelation 19:11-16
11 And I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse, and He who sat on it is called Faithful and True, and inrighteousness He judges and wages war. 12 His eyes are a flame of fire, and on His head are many diadems; and He has a name written on Him which no one knows except Himself. 13 He is clothed with a robe dipped in blood, and His name is called The Word of God. 14 And the armies which are in heaven, clothed in fine linen, white and clean, were following Him on white horses. 15 From His mouth comes a sharp sword, so that with it He may strike down the nations, and He will rule them with a rod of iron; and He treads the wine press of the fierce wrath of God, the Almighty. 16 And on His robe and on His thigh He has a name written, “KING OF KINGS, AND LORD OF LORDS.”
I want to live my life in such a way that I reveal the nature of God. When others look at me, I want them to know that there is an Everlasting Father because I am His child. Words are not sufficient for this. I must authentically find my identity in relationship with Jesus. Majority of that happens in the secret place. Who am I really when it's just me and God? Learning Who He is and how He desires me to relate to Him is something that takes time. I know what kind of life pleases my Heavenly Father because I sit with Him often, relishing His pleasure over the parts of my life I get right, and allowing His empowering grace to work on the parts that I don't. The result of this private relationship is a "well-loved child" mentality in the outer spheres of my life. 